number 8
35 years old. Australian Chinese. Bank IT engineer. The appearance is ordinary, the life photo looks very dark, and I feel like a Southeast Asian. Wearing a suit for a party photo with colleagues, she looks quite upright and energetic. The personal introduction is not fancy, just say that I love food and travel, and I don’t pretend to be forceful or make jokes, etc. Take this man as an example, he meets my criteria for choosing a mate. Neither outstanding nor bad in all aspects, it is material for a potential partner. Although looks are not my thing, I am willing to learn more.
Just say meet up. This time we made an appointment at a coffee shop in a shopping mall. It’s a little funny, I ran into him on the way to the coffee shop by taking a shortcut, I walked behind him, I saw that his satchel was the same as the picture, and he was of Chinese descent, so I sent him a message saying: You seem to be Go ahead of me. I just visually guessed that he read the text message, then turned his head and looked at me blankly, and then said hello to me.
I don’t know if he is shy, but anyway, I think this greeting is very unenthusiastic, and I must be greeting everyone with a smile on my face. I don’t mind, let’s go drink coffee.
We walked and chatted all the way, according to my observation, he is 180cm+ tall, a little hunchbacked, looks better than the photo, and is about 10% thinner, black is really black, sisters! It is understood that he is a network maintenance engineer of one of the four major banks, a Singaporean with Australian nationality. He has been in Australia for many years, and he basically doesn’t speak Mandarin. When I talk to him in English and Mandarin, he is a bit overwhelmed.
After chatting for a while, I felt that he seemed to relax a little bit, and he gradually became more enthusiastic, but his facial expressions and emotional ups and downs were not too big, just the calm state of quietly narrating things. His personality is not as outgoing as mine. I have a loud voice, laugh exaggeratedly, and love to joke. Just imagine, two people who didn’t know each other at first, and then sat together face to face drinking coffee, and the other was a slightly dull person, I could only keep talking and asking questions to avoid embarrassment, do you think I am in pain or not?
Although he doesn’t talk much, I think this is his personality, so I chatted with him patiently, and I didn’t feel any dislike for him. His hometown is still in Hainan Province. He told me about his return to Hainan to visit relatives not long ago, and I suddenly realized where his dark complexion came from.
Continue to number 8
Well here comes the point. He chatted about his unit and somehow got involved with the combination of Chinese and Western (certainly not I mentioned it). He said that there were two Asian ladies in his unit who combined with locals. Violence, one is that men are very picky.
Listening to his tone, there was a bit of hatred for iron and steel, and he said that the two ladies were very good and beautiful. I couldn’t figure out why they wanted to find a local. After he finished speaking, he asked me: Do you think it’s good to combine Chinese and Western?
I was drinking chocolate (I don’t drink coffee) and black question marks. The co-author made a big detour to ask for my opinion, but the subtext was to ask me if I had dated locals.
I immediately felt that this person was very scheming, so I replied to him directly in Mandarin: No matter where in China or abroad, there are examples of people being unkind. The domestic violence you mentioned is a human problem, and it has nothing to do with the people of the country. To me, There is no distinction between Chinese and Western feelings, and people all over the world are similar. After I finished speaking, I took a big mouthful of chocolate and didn’t want to answer his questions.
He laughed and said, “Yes.” However, I think the combination of Chinese and Western cultural backgrounds is much more prone to problems, and it is better to have the same culture. So what do you think about divorce?
I thought to myself: Well, it turned out that those were foreshadowing before, and now it is the highlight. Sure enough, he went on to say: Actually, I am divorced, I wonder if you mind? I said: Well, it’s your personal history, I’m not in a position to comment on it, and I don’t mind it.
He seemed relieved and went on to talk about why he got divorced. Mom, I didn’t ask you, I don’t want to know. Anyway, what he meant was that it was almost two years since the divorce because of their emotional incompatibility, but he still kept the dog left by his ex-wife.
He spoke slowly, with a small voice, and he was a little bit chatty, and the more he talked, the more boring I felt. In fact, I really don’t mind his divorce, what I mind is that he didn’t tell me in advance. If he tells me in advance, I will consider whether to meet or not. Anyway, he can’t be blamed, and no one stipulates that one’s marriage and love status should be disclosed on dating software, right? Blame me for being negligent this time.
With his own attitude of judging other people’s combination of Chinese and Western, and not telling me about his divorce in advance, my favor for him was greatly reduced. At that time, I thought, if I told him that my ex is a local, I don’t know what he would think. I kept my privacy and each went home.
I have to say that his personality is really introverted, and he is also very straight. After we went back, we didn’t chat much, and the messages he sent were all very blunt: hey, are you available on XX night, maybe we can go for dinner? I refused every time because I was very busy. Normally, a normal person would understand after two or three times like this, but he didn’t. After a few months, this big brother suddenly sent a message: are you available…..My God, we haven’t seen each other since the first time we met. We met and didn’t have an in-depth chat. How could he think that I would agree to go out with him after several months?
There is no story with No. 8 here. In fact, when I think about it occasionally, I still think that I am a bit artificial. In fact, I didn’t really mind his divorce after that. What I cared about was his contemptuous attitude when he commented on his colleague’s marriage.
No.9
35 years old. Chinese. Looking at the information, it is one of the eight major graduates with a master’s degree in civil engineering. The photo image is a typical nerd, wearing glasses, tall and big but not paying much attention to the appearance of the image. Yes, the image of the average programmer pops up in your mind.
In fact, although I look stylish and occasionally sexy on the outside, I am a nerd who likes to chase dramas, buy peripherals, play Warcraft, and occasionally program. The kind of geek that is not greasy and not wretched is quite in line with my appetite.
I matched to No. 8 and No. 9 at the same time. I thought it was a coincidence that there were about two Asians connected.
After chatting with the Chinese brother No. 9 about some basic situations, we decided to meet up. He also lamented that it is not easy to meet a Chinese girl on the software, and it is even more difficult to match successfully. I can understand his difficulty. It is said that the matching rate of Asian boys is really not high.
He proposed to meet at a Chinese restaurant. I rejected it. I was afraid that the meeting would be inappropriate and that I would have to eat and chat awkwardly, but thinking that he probably wouldn’t go to a bar, I made an appointment at a quiet Chinese snack bar. I am very happy thinking about meeting Chinese people, after all speaking the mother tongue is still very joyful, isn’t it?
Well, on the day of the meeting, before I went to the appointment, I never thought that this would be the fastest meeting in my history. How fast was it? I pinched my watch, 20 minutes from beginning to end.
The Chinese brother is at least 185+, with fair skin and acne on his face, and a native of a municipality directly under the Central Government. Hunchback plus walking Dala shoes, do you know what I’m talking about? The atmosphere is not clean.
When we ordered, we each paid our own way. After we sat down, he turned his legs up. With his accent, his demeanor seemed to say: Come on, tell us about your criminal history. Ha ha.
continue to number 9
The next step is really a formulaic blind date process (I have never been on a blind date in China, but I experienced it in Australia ?)
No.9: Your family belongs to XX? It’s a nice place with beautiful women.
Me: I don’t know who sealed it. I’m not anyway, lol.
No.9: How are your parents?
Me: answer truthfully
No.9: What are you doing now?
Me: tell the truth…
No.9: Then what did you do before?
Me: tell the truth…
No.9: You are fine in China, what are you doing in this ghostly place?! (After hearing my answer, he immediately raised his voice to ask me)
Me: I want to change my way of life. It was only when I came here that I realized that my original decision was right.
Number 9: Oh my gosh, I think it’s too boring to be interesting here. I just came back from a domestic tour, and it is better to be domestic.
(I just asked him about domestic travel, but he still kept the same tone and didn’t elaborate: Oh, that’s all.)
I felt bored, so I asked him: Now that you are back, what have you been doing recently?
No.9: I recently lost my job.
Me: It’s okay, you’ll find something if you look slowly, keep a good attitude, and besides, your major is very good, so you don’t have to worry about finding a job.
No. 9: (Continuing to raise the tone) When it comes to professionalism, I get angry! It is even more difficult to get a job if you have a broken major, and it is a waste of life. I came here from the X coast and found it worse.
Me: Haha, all of you top students are so unconfident, what can we scumbags do? Take your time, there is always a chance.
At this point in the conversation, I no longer have the desire to communicate. The other party’s negative attitude towards life is unacceptable to me.
Snacks are eaten quickly, and it has only been 15 minutes before and after I look at my watch, so it is not a good time to go. So I asked him if he had any plans for the stay. He said: No, just go home.
I thought to myself: Well, since you are so straightforward, you didn’t like me, and now I can find an opportunity to withdraw.
I asked him: I’m going to the supermarket next door to buy something, do you want to go with me?
No.9: Okay, let’s go together.
It doesn’t matter if you go to a supermarket, we will go together. After walking for a while, I found that the pharmacy was going to close, and I was going to buy an eyeglass care solution, so I asked him if he wanted to go to the pharmacy with me first. He quickly waved his hands: No, no, I’ll go home. Goodbye.
I was at a loss, I don’t want to eat you, why are you running so fast? Hahaha!
After returning home, my little brother’s show operation came, and he sent me a WeChat message saying: I think you are not bad, can we have a date?
I really called him three black question marks, and I said: Brother, don’t tease me, okay, you just ran so fast, I thought you were going to block me, is it a little bit to tell me about the relationship now? conflict?
No.9: No. You said you went to the pharmacy, I thought it was far away, so I left.
Me: It’s okay, I’m also to blame for changing back and forth, I’m sorry. The relationship is too fast, and I don’t think we are suitable, let’s be friends.
He read a few words saying that I will not give him a chance, but I never delete people, so I left him lying dead. He occasionally likes my circle of friends, and also leaves very self-aware words: Aren’t you busy? Why are you still free to go to XXX? I rolled my eyes, it’s none of your business.
The meeting with the Chinese brother was the second worst experience in my opinion (the scumbag who kissed me was definitely the first).
If you look at it from the domestic blind date thinking, this person is definitely popular in the domestic blind date market. How much does a house cost in a municipality directly under the Central Government (it is a magic city of housing prices)? Families who can pay for their own education in Australia and Australia must also be middle-class, right? Education and height are also unmarried and childless.
As far as I am here, I have turned a blind eye to these hardware conditions, and they have no attraction for me. Or say that I am still naive when I am young, and I have unrealistic fantasies about finding true love every day. However, I am willing to stick to this belief.
Language is very important in getting along with people, but it is not absolute. It is more to see whether the soul is compatible, making friends or lovers is applicable.
There must be no barriers to language communication between me and my Chinese brother, but it’s really not speculative. For example, when I asked him about traveling to XX in China, I would rather hear him introduce the local customs and experience for my reference, rather than just say that. How do you let me know your thoughts? How to develop other topics?
Generally, when meeting for the first time, talking about travel experiences is the easiest way to start a chatterbox, and not easy to step on the thunder. Many locals have very rich travel experience, they are very happy to share their knowledge, and through their sharing, I can learn about their preferences, attitudes in dealing with people, etc. This is a good start.
So sisters, don’t worry about your poor second language. The real medicine that can maintain the relationship between two people is the attitude and actions of both parties. And hormones lol.
I didn’t play any games today, I updated two in the morning, very hardworking, are you sure?
I’m thinking about whether to write about my favorite number 10 (it will be a bit long) or write about my local speed dating experience with a fitness trainer (who has become a good friend).
Which one do you want to hear? ah ah ah…
I’m going to play the game in the afternoon. Last night, I was told by my teammate that I’m not obedient. I don’t believe that I will fight for 300 rounds in the afternoon!